Navigating Loneliness Abroad by Lucy Garvie

Moving to a new country can be both exciting and daunting. At first, it can feel like an extended holiday. You are discovering a new place, trying out bars and restaurants, and meeting interesting people, without the fear of holiday blues. Yes, you might still have a day-job, but there’s so much to explore that your mid-week schedule feels a little novel. What could be more fun than being permanently on holiday, right?

But then reality starts to set in. You realise you can’t have an ‘apéro’ every night, and in fact, you really can’t afford to eat out every night either. You’ve met a couple of people in bars, but you haven’t quite got past the ‘acquaintance’ barrier. You try to catch up with friends from home, but as always, life gets in the way and there never seems to be a good time for a call.

As the novelty of the extended holiday wears off, you can start to feel a little lonely. This can be difficult to manage emotionally, but as someone who recently moved from Scotland to France, I hope that I can share some useful tips for anyone dealing with a similar situation.

When moving to a new place, I like to find a club or community that aligns with my interests. It’s a great way to meet like-minded people and normally doesn’t involve too much alcohol (which can be tricky to avoid when trying to make new friends!). For me, I enjoy playing sports, so I recently played touch rugby and I’m about to join a netball club. I’ve already met some lovely people and exercising always boosts my mood. If sports isn’t your thing, there’s plenty of other communities to choose from.

If you work from home, it’s important to schedule breaks and spend time outside during the day. My husband works from home and he makes it part of his daily routine to either go for a walk, eat lunch in the nearby park or head to the gym. Even if you are doing these activities solo, being out in nature or around other people typically lifts your mood and reduces feelings of loneliness.

Have you moved somewhere where you aren’t fluent in the local language? This can be especially difficult when trying to settle-in. While you get to grips with the language, you can join local expat groups on social media that help connect foreigners who are in the same situation. Meeting others who share the same culture or circumstances can help ease home-sickness. Most cities also have language exchange events, where you can improve your language skills and meet new people!

Finally, it’s worth pointing out that it’s also very normal to feel home sick at times. It takes time to set up a new life in a new place, so be kind to yourself & enjoy the journey!